Desires

I failed at keeping my schedule this week. Why am I not disciplined enough to stay on track?

I have this desire to wake up around 6am so that I can have quiet time with God, read my Bible and Pray before getting the kids up and ready for school, but instead it's my daughter waking me in the morning to tell me it's time to get up.

I have this desire to lose 20 or so pounds and work out everyday, but instead I get home and feel wiped out, tired and with too many other things to do so before I know it, it's time to get the kids from school and *poof*, out of time.

I have this desire to read everyday, but instead I find myself in front of the television watching a show that I don't really even care about, or worse I find a show I love and become obsessed with it.

I have this desire to go back to school and learn more than what I know, but I find myself doing the same old same old and have not finished up with registration.

My desires...are they God's desires? I'm sure that He would want me to spend more time with Him. I'm sure He wants me to be healthier. I'm sure he wants me to be a good steward of my time.

Why do I struggle with what I know I should do or even what I want to do? I would think that if there is something that I want to do, that I should be able to do it, but no. There is a battle...a battle between doing what I know is right and what I actually do.

Paul says it best. Galatians 5:17, "For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want."

That is how I feel most of the time, like I am fighting between what my spirit needs to do and what my flesh wants to do.  So I will try again this week, no, I will try today to turn my desires into discipline.

~Peace & Blessings~
Jen