It's all a blur

From day to day I feel like I'm on auto pilot and I really don't like that feeling. I want to live a life with intention, with purpose, with desire and joy. I don't think I've been living that way for the past couple of weeks. My days seemed to be filled with obligations and must dos. I know that I set my own schedule...to a point...but my desire is to not have so many obligations. I know that this is a very temporary feeling...and it's just that...a feeling. But anxiety is nothing to take lightly.

You see, I have this longing to just sit and be with God. I would love to do nothing more than spend hours in His Word and to sit quietly and listen to God and feel the Holy Spirit move me. This desire fights with my daily life as a wife, mother, and professional. I love that I work in ministry, but it is not the same as just sitting and being with God.

I have learned that there is a time and a season for everything in life. I have to believe and trust that I will have that time to just sit and be with God for long periods of time. My prayer is to be content with where I am right now, even if it does cause me to feel overwhelmed and anxious. I had never imagined that my life would be filled with so much love and joy, but I also never imagined it to be filled with so much business.

My prayer is to take the day one moment at a time and to "schedule" in downtime, and have no guilt over the downtime. Yeah, I believe I can (and should) do that.


~Peace & Blessings~
Jen